Our New Life

Monday, January 11, 2010

Looking back over 2009

I decided that my resolution for 2010 is to start blogging with meaning.

So I thought I would start by looking back over 2009 and what I remember the most of it.

I was in school to be a Medical Assistant. (that started in 2008) But anyways.. I am doing well in school and things in our lives are doing alright. We are happy. We decided that the 4 bedroom apartment that we had because we had foster kids in 2008, we no longer needed. So in May we decided we would move to a smaller place. I remember that month like it was yesterday. I started packing up the apartment, getting rid of things. I called my Grandma to see how she was doing. She was having surgery soon, so I called her often. She told me that she was excited for the surgery and that when I come down to get Sephy that we will go shopping. Oh how she loved to go shopping. So I remember talking to her the night before her surgery and she again told me, I am so happy and ready to do this. This is the best thing for me. I was scared because I couldn't come down to Texas to be with her. I was on my externship and almost done with school. So I told her I loved her and that I would talk to her when she woke up and that I would see her soon. I remember trying to stay so busy at work that day. I would text my Aunt and ask her if she had any news. No news Grandma was still in surgery. At around 8 my aunt called me and told me she was out of surgery and doing okay. At 10:30 I got that dreaded call. The call that I will never forget. My Aunt Sue called me and told me Reese Grandma's gone. I screamed. I have never felt so angry in my life. No matter how much you realize you have been angry at your spouse, girlfriend, or even your mom and dad. This didn't compare. I was mad at God, at the doctors. How could this happen. I was devastated and I was alone in my huge apartment. No one to hold my hand or to hug and comfort me. At that moment I just yelled out at God. Why did you take her from us. I never realized how hard it would be to loose her. That next week I remember some of the things that happened but a lot of it I think I blocked out because it is so painful. I miss her everyday and will always miss her.
For the next two months I made the drive to Texas and spent the weekends with my Grandpa. One Sunday My husband picked up the want ads and saw a job posting for an IT Manager in Mississippi. See at the time we where living in Oklahoma City. Our family is in Texas and now he wants us apply for a job in Mississippi.. I am like OMG no way. But if you want to try for it go ahead. Maybe this is the answer to my prayers to get me out of Oklahoma. But I wanted to go back to Texas closer to my family not further away from them. He applied for it on Monday and by Thursday we where in Jackson, MS.. Wow I have never been East only North and West. We drove 2 hrs the next morning to a little town called Laurel. Wow the place is so pretty. The trees in MS are huge and so green, everything is green. I was impressed. I fell in love with this little town. The people here where great. Everyone was so nice. It felt like somewhere I could raise our daughter and Start a new life away from all the memories of 2008 that where haunting me. So his interview last like 7hrs. What kind of interview last that long??? So he doesn't get a job offer before we leave. I was hoping he would have. So weeks go by and finally the administrator calls him and offers him a job. So he has to be there is 2 weeks. I am like wow 2 weeks. So back to packing I went again. Moved in May to a smaller place and now I am moving in August to a far away place. When we left Oklahoma, I was sad to leave my friends "my family" that I grown to love to be there for me and to support me. We took a week to get to MS. We spent it with my family. I spent most of it with my Pawpa. I needed to spend it with him. He misses his wife just as I miss his wife. So we take that trip to the East. What a long trip it is. I had lots of time to myself that trip. Hubby in the moving ruck and me and my kiddo in the van. I prayed a lot that trip. I prayed for a new start, a new life away from the negative. When we got here on Sept 4th. It felt like a whole new beginning. We loved the house that the Realtor is renting us. It is a cute little house. The only draw back was the rain. It rained almost the whole month of September. Sephy started school the first part of October. We decided it would be better for her to make friends at school than to keep homeschooling her. She loves it. She is learning the Violin, and she has friends. We have a wonderful church family.
Life is good here. I am so blessed to be here in Mississippi.
Christmas time and we get to go home to Texas!! YEAH!!! I was counting down the days. But come the 9th of December we are rear-ended. So I was like great we aren't getting to go home. But the insurance came through in time and we got a rental car the day before we where leaving to head to Texas. The trip took us 11 hrs to get to my moms. I was exhausted. We slept for a bit and went shopping. Christmas Eve was so not a normal Christmas eve for us. It snowed and was Icy. I didn't get to see all my family. Worst yet I missed my grandma even more. It was a nice evening. I got to meet the newest member of our family. She is such a precious little girl. I already miss holding her. It was quite and an intimate Christmas eve. I really did enjoy it, but so missed seeing some of my family, and most of all my Grandma. Christmas day was great. Sephy had a wonderful morning and got almost everything she wanted. She was a happy little girl! We had a great trip and some good times and some sad times. I miss my family but was so happy to be home in Mississippi!!!! So with that being said.. we brought in the new year asleep on the couch as a peaceful happy family. I had a those ups and downs in 2009 but I think this year is just getting better and better and it is only 11 days into it so far.

5 Acts of Love..:

Apryl

As you might expect your blog made me cry tears for my mom tonight but it was beautiful. We are all so lucky to have known her and been loved by her. She was truly my blessing from above.

Sephysmomma

It made me cry as I wrote it. I think that it helped me a little to share what I went through even if it was only a tiny glimpse of my life from last year.

Apryl

Unfortunately her passing consumed more than half of 2009 for me. Still learning to live without her, even today. Much, much harder than anything I have ever faced in my life. Didn't realize that sadness could last so long and hurt so deep.

JDaniel4's Mom

What a tough piece to write! What lessons I can take from it. Thanks for stopping by.

Robin

I just read it. WOW!! I can't imagine being alone when you get that kind of news. I wish you could have been closer, or at least with somone to help comfort you.
I bet ya'll are like me and Dre. We have had too many eventful months. We are ready for a "normal" year, whatever that means. It has been so long I forget what it is like.
Here's to hoping 2010 is nothing but normal! :)

Oh, ps, Alexis misses you too!

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